Wednesday, January 6, 2010

My Prince Cheapskate

My husband has MANY quirks. Somehow a few of them eluded me before we got hitched. Then they surfaced and drove me nuts. Gradually I got used to them. Now they just add to his charm.

One of these quirks is cheapness.

This was one of the first 'unknowns' that I discovered after marriage. I never really knew it before hand because we didn't live together, and he only visits his frugality on himself. With me and other loved ones, he's more than generous. But with himself, he couldn't be tighter.

He loves nothing more than to put on an ugly shirt and say "see this shirt? Nineteen ninetyfive." He's not talking about the price, folks. That's the year he got the shirt.

This man has no shame when it comes to holding on to money.

Exhibit A:

The piece of paper in front of the bad mango is a note from him to me, reading "DO NOT THROW AWAY." Why not throw away a bad piece of fruit? Because he planned to return it to the grocery store and get his dollar fifty back. (If you're curious about the monster in the refrigerator, you can read about it here.)

Another facet of his cheapness is an intense affection for change. He delights in paying for purchases with coins. This was the source of much friction when we were newlyweds. Now he warns me ahead of time so I can hide while he's counting nickels with ten people behind him in line at WalMart. When the cashier acts annoyed, Mike says in his Ugandan accent "I understand this is United States currency. Is that accurate?" This makes me smile every time (from my hiding place of course).

What quirks do you love about your mate?


  1. every work day J takes off his button up shirt and just sports his tee shirt. the button ups end up all over the house. He never picks them up! I just leave them there, after 8 years I don't really even notice them. :)

  2. Mike really needs to meet Lloyd. For real. I do recall a time when we went to the movies and paid with all change (in middle school of course. 50/50 chance it was either billy madison or forrest gump) and then the ticket taker told us you could not bring your drink into the theater, so you proceeded to dump all the remaining coins into your drink, and you told the ticket taker, "this isn't my drink, it's my wallet". hahahah one of my fave stories of you.

  3. PS Don't even get me started on Scott's black pants!

  4. Cass, maybe I'll be as mature as you after 8 years of marriage. Laundry NEAR the hamper still ticks me off!

    Mer, I totally forgot about that. Man, I was annoying! That was around the time we were always wearing flannels, which are currently all over Target, btw. I think that's the first trend I'm too old to participate in because I already lived through it once.

  5. Oh wow. Meredith, I love that story about the movies! I need to hear more stories about Joy and her hi-larious past!

  6. Mer, I just thought of the time you asked Lloyd for fifty dollars for shoes and he told said "for one pair of shoes? you could get fifty pairs of flip flops for that money..."

  7. Joy, I heart your blog. It makes me laugh out loud. My better half wakes up singing every morning. EVERY morning. At first, I too did not notice. When we moved in together there was only one bathroom in the hallway, so I could not hear the singing. Our first house (complete with ensuit bathroom) introduced me to the morning musical stylings. Songs like: Rock You Like a Hurricane, Hollaback Girl, Baby Beluga and The Star-Spangled Banner are an everday occurence. We don't wake up to the radio, so I don't even know where these songs come from...I just lay in bed and laugh out loud as he springs out of bed singing like a Disney cartoon every morning :)

  8. Ugh, ensuite bathroom, but you probably knew that :)

  9. Bri, we are living parallel lives! My hubby isn't into Top 40, though. I hear traditional Swahili tunes EVERY DAY. There's also LOTS of whistling.